R-Type Delta.

Image stolen from Chudah's Corner

After a week away, I'm certain all none of you are eagerly awaiting the next soundtrack, and here it is!

What I see: Well, it's blue, probably scary. Looks like the blueprints for something, actually. Some sort of gigantic multi-mouthed thingy. Ooooh, scary. Yet, strangely technical, as though you're going to go to a meeting and present the proposal for whatever scary things you're planning.

What I expect to hear: A bunch of business speak explaining how some guy is going to create a gigantic monster for fun and profit.

Would I buy it? Nope.

The Q-Mex Collection

Image stolen from Chudah's Corner, , obviously.

What I see: Poor child prodigy. Sure, you can play piano really well, and you have thick framed glasses which are apparently cool now*, but do your parents really love you? Or are they just using you as a means to get fame and (more likely) fortune for themselves? Once you're old and ugly like Macaulay Culkin, will they just drop you and steal all your money?

What I expect to hear: Well, he's sitting at a piano, looking slightly pensive, probably Beethoven?

Would I buy it? Well, I DO like Beethoven.

*Okay, thick framed glasses, it's on. Yes, I know they look good on women with dark hair who wear turtlenecks. Hell, I've got some sort of strange thing for that. But seriously, they're not cool for everyone else! I'd like to think that, as a society, we should be making our glasses thinner and more streamlined, not thickening them up like some sort of...thing...that needs thickening. When I replace my glasses, I fear I'll be stuck getting some clunky 'trendy' frames instead of something really frameless and sleek, that will blend in with my head better. I'll look horrible with trendy glasses, or at least like some insufferable hipster. I know I have hipster tendencies, but I don't want to become a full blown one! And I'm lightly annoyed by the frames on my glasses enough, how I can always see the edge of them. How bad is that going to be when the frames are bloody huge like the trend is nowdays? Pretty goddamn bad, I'll tell you what. Hell, this shit gives you a goddamn blind spot. A small one, I admit, and I've got so bloody much hair that blinds me way more, but that's hardly the point.

Maybe when I get the last silver frameless glasses in the universe (it's what I intend to get when I replace my current, lightly unattractive brown frames), I'll start a new trend. Because I am sick of thick framed glasses on anyone who isn't a dark haired girl in a turtleneck.

Pac-Man

Image again stolen from Chudah's Corner. If you like game soundtracks, maybe go there?

What I see: Around here, I know it's the drill to make some snarky comments about what the album cover looks like or might represent, but today I'll cut to the heart of the matter. This cover is shit. The Pac-men are badly drawn and colored (what the hell is wrong with their mouths?), the font is awful, the color scheme is cheap, and it generally gives the vibe of something a 5-year old would make to cover his cassette copy of the Pac Man theme he recorded off of his Atari.

What I expect to hear: See above.

Would I buy it? No. Not a chance. Though it did somehow wind up on my hard drive somehow.

N64 ANTHEMS HARDCORE EXTREME MIX

Image stolen from Chudah's Corner.

What I see: Man is this extreme or what? Look at how the background is all blurry, and the text has multiple extreme outlines! And only a totally extreme product would use about 12 different fonts. That, or one of those CDs you find in a bin tucked away in the darkest corner of Wal-Mart, right beside the compilation of top 80s hits, including Hugh Lewinson and the Current Events.

What I expect to hear: Really bad covers of songs from the games listed, obviously. Maybe with some added vocals by some tone deaf guy.

Would I buy? It says free on the cover, maybe I don't have to?

Ma-Na

Image Stolen From Chudahs Corner.

What I see: This looks less like an album cover and more like something on which to write your grocery list on. Ah, I see someone needs to buy some Ma-Na, whatever that is. Or maybe someone needs to remember to buy some files for their cabinet, specifically section Ma-Na. Whatever it is, it seems like menial household chores and not music.

What I Expect to Hear: Something light, breezy, and empty. The musical equivalent to the lady on newscasts who introduces wacky clips of dogs.

Would I buy? No, but now that you mention it, I probably do need to pick up some eggs at the store, maybe I should write it down under my Ma-Na.

L.E.D. Denjin K

Stolen from Chudah's Corner.

What I see: Cool. That's all I see. Just some cooool stuff there. The stars, the weird looking rocks, the font, the cool blues. It's just cool this cover, and I don't even know what it's supposed to be.

What I expect to hear: For some reason, it looks like some sort of dark avant-garde techno act, which is kinda cool. There would be some thundering bass and some ominous noise and it'd all be very badass and wonderful.

Would I but it? Yep. It's taking everything I've got to not just buy it right now.

Kaenseibo ~The Virgin of Meggido~

Image stolen from Chudah's Corner. I'm tired of being clever about it.

What I see: Behold my magical armpits! With these I can summon the ghosts of crumpets past! With them, I shall destroy the world!

What I expect to hear: Well, from the title and the skirt fluttering like it belongs to Merilyn Monroe, I have a sneaking suspicion this is some sort of porno game. And thus, it probably sounds like porno music.

Would I buy? Ahhh, no.